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After spending all day watching football, Harry fell asleep in front of the TV and spent the whole night in the chair. In the morning, his wife woke him up. "Get up dear," she said, "it's 20 to seven." He awoke with a start and said, "In who's favor?"
Television (2), Football (4), Sport (5)

What is the difference between a sofa and a man watching Monday Night Football? The sofa doesn't keep asking for beer.
Football (4), Men (107), Alcohol (6), Beer (11)

One Sunday afternoon, a guy walks into a bar with his pet dog. The bartender said, "Sorry, pal. No pets allowed."

The man replied, "This is a special dog. Turn on the Jets game and you'll see."

The bartender, anxious to see what will happen, turned on the game.

The guy said, "Watch. Whenever the Jets score, my dog does flips." The Jets keep scoring field goals and the dog keeps flipping and jumping.

"Wow! That's one hell of a dog you got there. What happens when the Jets score a touchdown?" asked the bartender.

The man replied, "I don't know. I've only had him for seven years."

New York Jets (1), Football (4), Dogs (15), Animals (25)

Your mama is so fat, when she plays football she plays offense and defense.
Your Mama (28), Football (4)

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