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Your mama is so clumsy she got tangled up in a cordless phone!
Your Mama (28), Phones (4)

Your mama is so fat and old that when God said "Let there be Light", he told her to move her fat ass out of the way.
Your Mama (28), God (23), Ass (7)

Your mama is so fat, when she jumped in the ocean the Whales started singing "We are family ..."
Your Mama (28), Whales (1)

Your mama is so fat, she stepped on a scale and she saw her phone number.
Your Mama (28), Scales (2), Phone Numbers (2)

Your mama is so poor, she can't even afford to pay attention.
Your Mama (28), Poverty (5), Attention (2)

Your mama is so fat, her ass has its own congressman.
Your Mama (28), Ass (7), Congressmen (1)

Your mama is so fat, when she crosses the street, cars look out for her.
Your Mama (28), Traffic (2)

Your mama is so ugly, when she got in the tub, the water jumped out.
Your Mama (28), Water (3)

Your mama is so fat, she wears a watch on each arm, one for each timezone.
Your Mama (28), Time Zones (1)

Your mama is so fat, "Place Your Ad Here" is printed on each of her butt cheeks.
Your Mama (28), Commercials (2), Butts (1)

Your mama is so ugly, the Pro-Lifers would make an exception in her case.
Your Mama (28), Pro-Lifers (2)

Your mama is so poor, I walked into her house, asked to use the bathroom, and she said "3rd tree to your right."
Your Mama (28), Poverty (5), Trees (3)

Your mama is so fat, she has to use a boomerang to put on her belt!
Your Mama (28), Boomerangs (1)

Your mama is so fat, the horse on her Polo shirt is real.
Your Mama (28), Horses (4), Polo Shirts (1)

Your mama is so ugly, even the tide won't come back in.
Your Mama (28), Tide (1)

Your mama is so fat, I ran around her twice and got lost.
Your Mama (28)

Your mama is so poor, she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken to lick other people's fingers.
Your Mama (28), Poverty (5), Kentucky Fried Chicken (1)

Your mama is so ugly, she makes blind children cry.
Your Mama (28), Children (26)

Your mama is so fat, every time she wears high heels, she strikes oil.
Your Mama (28), High Heels (1), Oil (1)

Your mama is so fat, she could sell shade.
Your Mama (28), Shade (1)

Your mama is so fat, when she gets on the scale it says "To be continued."
Your Mama (28), Scales (2)

Your mama is so fat, the shadow of her ass weighs 50 pounds.
Your Mama (28), Shadows (1), Ass (7)

Your mama is so ugly, she'd scare the monster out of Loch Ness.
Your Mama (28), Monsters (2), Loch Ness (1)

Your mama is so fat, the telephone company gave her two area codes.
Your Mama (28), Area Codes (2)

Your mama is so poor, when I ring the doorbell she says "DING!"
Your Mama (28), Poverty (5), Doorbells (1)

Your mama is so fat, when she bends over we go into daylight savings time.
Your Mama (28), Time (2)

Your mama is so fat, when she plays football she plays offense and defense.
Your Mama (28), Football (4)

Your mama is so fat, she has her own area code.
Your Mama (28), Area Codes (2)

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